Trust The Science
Trust The Science
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- 30 Day Returns
- No Pants!
Size Guide
Size Guide
Form-fitting size: Order your exact measurements.
Relaxed fit: Order one size larger than your measurements.
Measurements:
| LENGTH (inches) | WIDTH (inches) | CHEST (inches) | |
| S | 28 | 18 | 34-37 |
| M | 29 | 20 | 38-41 |
| L | 30 | 22 | 42-45 |
| XL | 31 | 24 | 46-49 |
| 2XL | 32 | 26 | 50-53 |
| 3XL | 33 | 28 | 54-57 |
Easy Returns
Easy Returns
You don't like what you got, or maybe didn't get the right size? No worries, use the return address on the package insert and send it back for a full refund.
See our full policy here
Garment Information
Garment Information
Our blanks are sourced from the USA. All our shirts are extra soft, made with 100% airlume combed and ring-spun cotton.
Made With Care
Made With Care
Your shirt is carefully printed after you order. We don’t stock huge warehouses of wasted fabric.
Handling
Handling
Our shirts have pre-shrunk fabrics to ensure you clothing doesn't shrink in the wash. We do recommend a cold water wash, with a gentle tumble dry cycle though. Avoid hot water and high heat drying to preserve soften.
How's the design?
Collections
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Bipartisan
Left? Right? Would you just shut up the f*ck up? You’re both...
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Rabbit Hole
Reality is fake, towers don't fall by themselves, and your dentist is...
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Trust Issues
Big brother is watching. But you already knew that, huh?We get it...
ShirtsShirtsShirts: History In The Making
A totally accurate, and completely legit timeline of how we came to be.
↓
Birth in Primordial Fire
4,206,969 BC
While other lifeforms were busy evolving into boring shit like fish, the sacred fibers of SX3 were woven from volcanic ash, and dinosaurs juices. The Earth groaned, and SX3 was birthed, flipping the bird to evolution itself.
Uninvited Guest at The Last Supper
33 AD
SX3 appeared unannounced at the Last Supper, wearing a tunic that read, "THIS GUY LOVES WINE" with two thumbs up. Jesus laughed so hard he accidentally turned water into wine. Judas was less amused (classic Judas).
SX3 Infects the New World
1492
SX3, too drunk to paddle across the Atlantic, sent Columbus as our unpaid intern to go "find something cool." He discovered the wrong place, gave everyone syphilis, and we still had to show up ourselves to explain what a continent is.
Signing the Declaration of Independence
1776
Hidden in the margins of Jefferson’s fancy scroll, SX3 scrawled in crayon, "FREEDOM TO WEAR WHATEVER THE F#CK WE WANT." John Hancock tried to object but was distracted by our sick-ass limited edition 'Redcoat Sucks' tee. Circa 1776.
Victory in WWII (Because of Shirts)
1945
Forget tanks. Forget nukes. SX3 dropped crates of shirts over Europe that said, "Suck This Axis" and "Kiss Me, I’m Allied," which psychologically destroyed enemy morale and ended the war. (You're welcome.)
The Great Millennial Rebirth
1999
When humanity chose between the red pill and the blue pill, SX3 crushed both into powder, snorted them off a flip phone, and headbutted reality so hard the simulation glitched forever. We’ve been unsupervised ever since.
SX3: The Unstoppable Anti-Brand
2024
After centuries of being banned, canceled, uninvited, and occasionally set on fire, SX3 is alive and thriving — the World's Dumbest Shirt Brand, fueled by caffeine, spite, and an unwavering middle finger to everything.
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