Made In The US of F*cking A: A Glorious Breakdown for the Curious and the Commie-Hunting

Alright, you suspicious little freedom-sniffer, you made it. You could’ve just taken our word for it, but noooo—you wanted proof. Data. Receipts. Probably the kind of person who checks under the bun at a cookout too. But fine. You asked for it.

Every SX3 shirt is made and printed right here in the land of monster trucks and constitutional crises. That’s right—Made. In. The. USA. Not “assembled.” Not “touched by American air.” Actually made, actually printed, actually infused with liberty-scented BO.

You could’ve just accepted that everything we sell is proudly made and printed in the U.S. of F*cking A and kept browsing like a normal red-blooded legend. But nope. You had to click. You had to know more. You had to sniff the fine print like a lawyer with trust issues.

So here it is: your reward.

Let’s get into it.

First off: Every product you buy is made with 100% red-coat-hating DNA.

The base shirt—the blank canvas upon which we spray our genius—is sourced from Bella+Canvas, an actual company, not a cartoon pairing. They're based in the United States, not outsourced to a floating garbage island in international waters. Their whole thing is sustainability, ethical practices, and doing stuff the right way. Which is weird, but fine.

So what does that mean for you, Captain Click-Happy?

It means the fabric you're wearing is most likely woven in California by some dude who listens to Roe Jogan and plays in a cover band on weekends. Bella+Canvas runs their operation with things like “solar energy” and “fair wages” and “not turning the planet into a landfill.”

That’s a cool story, bro.

Next up: Printing.

Once Bella+Canvas makes the blank shirt, we don’t just stare at it like idiots.
They send it to Printful, who uses magical shirt sorcery (fine, it’s called DTG—Direct To Garment printing, but whatever) to blast your shirt with high-res, full-color, nightmare-fueled memes.

Printful does the printing right here in the States. Like, for real. Not “assembled in America from components made in the ninth circle of China” vibes. It’s printed in facilities with walls, windows, and probably at least one guy named Todd who owns a lifted F-150.

Every shirt is handled with care. Or if not care, at least with caffeine and nicotine. The important part is: it’s done here, not in some radioactive textile swamp in JINNNA.

Now, shipping.

Your item gets shipped from U.S. soil to your doorstep via USPS, UPS, or the occasional rogue FedEx driver who throws it like a Hail Mary pass from the street. Either way, it’s American logistics, baby. Real vans. Real routes. Real probability of it getting slightly bent in transit. It’s all part of the charm.

We'll even give you a tracking number—who would have thought!? (Not us...)

Skeptical? Fine. Here’s your nerd data:

— Bella+Canvas is WRAP Certified. That means safe, lawful, humane working conditions. That’s right—no factory nightmares here. (Looking at you Beff Jezos...)

— They recycle leftover fabric like it’s an Olympic sport. (Recycling is usually a scam, but not in this case, at least that's what they told me to say...)

— They filter and reuse water like doomsday preppers on a mission. (*insert California wild-fire joke here)

— Their sewing and cutting floor is solar-powered, which means your shirt may contain literal sunlight. (You're welcome)

— Printful uses water-based inks and doesn't make a print unless you order it. No waste. No warehouses full of unsold cringe. (Anti-Anti-Spirit-Halloween Club?)

— Both companies are committed to bacon-loving, give-me-liberty-or-give-me-death, and oh-shit-you-got-oil-time-to-invade, U.S.A quality.

Still reading? (What a weirdo...) You okay?

You’re now 600+ words into what is essentially a flex about how American our shirts are. You could’ve stopped 500 words ago and still made a good decision. But you had to KNOW. You had to see behind the curtain.

So here it is: Made. Printed. Shipped. In the USA.
Not outsourced. Not sketchy. Not low-quality. Not pretending.
We even accept returns. (F*ck you Amazon Prime, see what you did!)

And that’s all you really needed to know, right?
But instead, you got this.
A goddamn novella about t-shirts.
No pants!

That’s what you get for clicking the link, nerd.
Now go buy something, would ya!